I realized it’s been almost two weeks since my last posting on here. I got it in my head that since nothing new was happening with the adoption route that there was nothing worth writing about and had to just now remind myself that that’s not the only reason I started this - though it is a major one.
Thanksgiving is coming in only two more days and I’m really excited! Two more days before I get to see my niece for the 3rd time, and my nephews, and my mom, and my sister… I am SO EXCITED! My sister has teasingly posted on her Myspace that she has a ton of pictures to post of all three kids and I’m checking back daily but she’s taking forever on that, least it feels like it! (hint, hint, Melanie :) My roommate, Jamie, may be coming home with me for the day, I’ll know by tonight and that’ll be fun if it happens! It’s hard thinking it’s almost December which means almost next year and eagerly thinking about all the changes I’m anticipating coming! It’s going to mean a move to a larger and nicer apartment and possibly a daughter! It’ll be the best year of my life so far, if it does that!
Only one small note on the adoption process. The lady in charge of foster parenting and adoption at the DHHR office called me yesterday. She now has me down for attending the Orientation meeting which will actually be a week before the first training session; the Orientation meeting is scheduled for January 8th at 6 pm here in Beckley! She took down some personal information (date of birth, social security number, and mailing address) and also my personal preferences of a girl, no race preference, and either a single child or possibly being open to the idea of a sibling group but of no more than two children tops.
I think she was hoping that I would do foster parenting. She asked if I was interested in both foster parenting and adoption or just foster parenting; I told her just adoption. She informed me that that can often mean a longer wait before a child is placed with me. I have to admit, the idea of having a child placed with me even sooner is extremely tempting but I’m too afraid that it would feel like it was tearing me to shreds the day the child was ever removed to another foster care home or returned to the parents. I can’t seem to bring anything, human or animal, into my life without loving it completely and fully. Even with the foreknowledge that a certain child very likely would not stay with me longterm, as much as I might attempt to try not to fall in love with the child, I don’t think I’d be able to help myself. I see children as needing love more than anything else, especially a hurting child. I’d have way too much trouble letting go. I want a child that will be permanent!
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